Lighthearted Thoughts from the Emergency Room

Between my wife and myself, two trips to the ER were made this past week. (Yes, we are both feeling better). While there, I had some thoughts...

I noticed that going to the ER was much like getting an oil change. You know...you take your car for an oil change, and they change their oil, and rather than sending you on your way, they decide they want to check out the rest of your car, for things it doesn't need. Upselling is what they call it..."Mr. Parker, we got your oil changed, and we checked everything else just in case....we noticed you may need to have your timing belt replaced, and it looks like your fly wheel could use and adjustment. We also want to go ahead and run a full diagnostic test to make sure everything else is running smoothly...total it'll be about $45 extra...that ok?"  To which I always promptly reply "No thanks...just the oil change." Same concept must apply in the Emergency Room. Olivia went in for breathing problems due to Bronchitis. Then the Dr. came in and said "Well, we are going to go ahead and send you over to ultrasound to check your legs for blood clots." WHAT? I didn't object seeing as how insurance was paying the bill, but an oil change is what I thought of...selling you something completely different from what you came for. It would be like me coming a runny nose, and them checking me for ingrown toenails. Just makes one shake their head...I guess it's their way of "upselling..."

I also noticed that in some places in ER, the rooms are situated horribly wrong. HORRIBLY. How? Well, let me just say this...I had to go to the end of the hallway to get out of the ER. The room at the end of the hallway near the exit, has a bed directly in front of the door, with the patients feet facing the door. Door was open. Patient had on a hospital gown. Patient had legs propped up. Patient had on no underware. Patient was at least 95 years old. Let that simmer.

Last of all, I wondered about the magazines in the ER waiting room. Lots of good ones, which made everything so difficult...I mean...is it ok to read those? The people that come to the ER are all very sick with various viruses and fevers, and you know those things have to be crawling with germs. But the wait is soooo long sometimes. (We waited almost 2 hours one visit) I held off as long as I could, but after an hour of looking at a Super Bowl edition Sports Illustrated, and Entertainment Weekly magazines, I had to read them. Of course, I took a bath in hand sanitizer afterwords, but that is just cruel...I mean...how do you fix that problem? I don't guess you do...

So, interesting trips to the ER. These thoughts were mostly from Olivia's visit and not mine, because I wasn't really aware of the world around me during my visit. I did sneak away with a couple pairs of rubber gloves though...after all, who knows when they might come in handy seeing as how there is a new baby on the way next month...